Can God Love You at Your Worst?
How Parenting Reveals the Father’s Love
Can God really love you at your worst? Christian artist Ryan Stevenson says yes! That revelation came to him as he watched his daughter in the middle of a toddler meltdown.
For Ryan, that moment changed everything. In a recent episode of LIFE In Session from Family Life Radio, Ryan opened up about how becoming a father—especially to a daughter born during the COVID pandemic — has transformed the way he sees God. Not as a distant deity, but as a good, good Father.
The Performance Trap
Ryan grew up in what he calls “a pretty fundamental religious environment.”
“I never got to learn about the heart of a father,” he says, reflecting on his early years. “I grew up in an environment where men were workers, men were tough… not always necessarily close and intimate with the kids.”
The same was true in his faith experience. “What I was learning inside of religion was: God is distant… there’s rules and hoops to jump through and boxes to check.” Ryan internalized a message many Christians can relate to—that your worth is tied to your performance.
“I felt like I inherited a performance-based approach to God… like I’m only as valuable as my last ability to perform really well.”
Seeing God As Abba
Then 2020 hit. In the middle of global uncertainty, Ryan and his wife, who already had two sons, welcomed a daughter.
“It was such a catastrophic, beautiful breakdown and a turning of a page,” he says. That moment unraveled old belief systems. “Through my daughter, the Lord really began to untether me from these weird old religious paradigms.”
Ryan shared that year he felt like God was pulling him into “sort of a wilderness kind of season, where I’m just face-to-face with Him all the time.” And he says, “I’m learning about this God that’s not just some distant celestial cast iron being… but he is ABBA,” he says, referencing John 14. “Jesus said, ‘If you’ve seen me, you’ve seen the Father.’”
In that significant shift, Ryan began to understand something new. “Man, I’m not separated from God. I am beloved of the Father. I am the righteousness of God in Christ.”
Even when he didn’t feel it—“not because I feel it or think it; because that’s who He says I am.”
How Parenting Helped Ryan Heal
Ironically, it was the messy moments with his own kids that taught him the most about God’s heart. “On my kids’ worst day, when they’re fighting, bickering, doing everything wrong, they’re still the love of my life,” he says. “I’m fascinated with my children in their filthiest state. And that is just the way the Father feels about us. And that is what is changing me.”
That realization—that even in our mess, we are still loved—answered the question Ryan didn’t even know he was asking: Can God love me at my worst?
Living Loved and Free
Now, Ryan’s journey is about living anchored in his true identity. “The more I understand who I am… the more I become absolutely rooted and established in my identity as His beloved son… it frees me up every day to be present with people.”
He no longer sees people as projects. “Nobody’s a target to me anymore. Nobody is an agenda. No relationship is leverage. Because I’m beginning to understand that I’m so loved and accepted.”
That shift also affects how Ryan defines intentional living. “My prayer every night, whether I’m doing a show or a concert, is that the Spirit of God would pierce your heart with the revelation that you are beloved. I think that is the ground floor of the biggest revolution [and] an awakening this world has ever known.”
An Invitation to Be Loved
You don’t have to perform for God. You don’t have to fix yourself before coming close.
Ryan points to relationship. “Maybe for the first time in my life, I’m learning I am not the one designed to take care of myself. It is He who began a good work, and He is going to be the One to complete it.”
So, can God love you at your worst? Ryan Stevenson’s answer, born in the chaos of parenting and the quiet of grace, is a resounding yes. You are beloved by the Father. Right now. Mess and all.
Want to go deeper? Learning to Live Loved is a free 5-day devotional on YouVersion designed to help you experience God’s love in a personal way. Whether you’re new to faith or finding your way back after a weary season, this short journey will remind you that you are seen, pursued, and deeply valued by the Father.
Find the plan on YouVersion and take the next step toward living loved.