Aging Gracefully

Essential Tips for Maintaining Health and Happiness

Julie Baumgardner

I remember when I first started getting gray hair. My then-teenage daughter was totally embarrassed! She told me I had to start coloring my hair. I laughingly replied, “No way! I have earned every one of these, and I’m going to wear them proudly.”

Fast forward a few years, when it started to become cool to have gray hair, and a number of women told me how courageous they thought I was for going gray. Here’s the cold, hard truth: I just don’t have the patience to get my hair colored, especially when it would cover up evidence of the long life God has richly blessed me with.

It’s interesting that when we are young, we so desperately want to be older. We want to be seen as more seasoned and mature, so we round up our age as proof. We say, “I’m almost 16, 18, 21, 30.” But once we hit our 30s, the tables quickly turn, and people say things like, “I’m barely 40,” “50 is really the new 30,” “I’m 59 and holding,” and the like.

Ecclesiastes 3 says, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die” (ESV). Not to be morbid, but it’s true: We are simply passing through this life as we prepare for eternal life with the Father.

We are also told in John 10:10 that “the thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy…but [Jesus] came that [we] may have life and have it abundantly” (ESV).

My goal has been to embrace all the decades and make the most of them.

I could spend a lot of time and energy trying to keep myself young and actually miss out on what God has for me in this second half of life. I could allow my joy to be stolen by the passing-by of youth and fail to live into the abundance He has for me. In a determined effort to rob the enemy of that satisfaction, my goal has been to embrace all the decades and make the most of them—and, in the process, to learn from others who are ahead of me on the journey and seem to be aging gracefully.

My sweet mother-in-law, who is 91 years old, has been a wonderful example of this graceful aging. She absolutely loves life and stays incredibly active. I’ve watched her continue to live life to the fullest in her later years, keeping her mind sharp by participating in book clubs and attending lectures about all kinds of things. I love that she still wants to learn. This is who I want to be at 91!

She takes great care of herself by exercising, getting enough rest, paying attention to her mental health, and being diligent with all of her routine medical screenings (well, most of them). We’ve talked many times about the fact that taking care of yourself isn’t a luxury.

Being the healthiest version of yourself is a gift to you, your family, friends, and co-workers.

And, ultimately, it’s a gift back to our Creator as a “thank you” for the temple He has given us.

As I continue to watch my mother-in-law and others who seem to be aging gracefully, here are a few additional things I am leaning into in this season:

• Laughter truly is good medicine.

I have been fortunate to have a husband who brings  laughter into our home and marriage every single day. Growing up in a serious household, laughter hasn’t always come easily for me, but through the years I have come to believe laughter helps you live longer and not take yourself so seriously.

• Embrace the changes life brings.

There is no question that as you age, there are all kinds of changes that occur. Your body doesn’t do all the things it used to do. (Readers are a thing!) It’s tempting to ignore the changes or get irritated about them, but as much as you can, try to see them as testaments of a life actually lived.

I recently got bucked off my horse and broke my back. My pride, along with my back, took a hit. I’ve been riding for a long time and prided myself on not ever coming off my horse. I’ve had to come to terms with the fact that my body is changing, and I’m going to have to do some things differently. And that’s okay; praise God for the ability to still be riding horses in my 60s!

• Keep your friendships strong.

I love that my mother-in-law still gathers people together, young and old. Just the other day, she called to make sure we would be available to come to her house for a special lunch. That woman loves to plan a good party! Spending time with friends and family keeps your brain alert and helps avoid the loneliness that can creep in as we age.

• Find people who are a season or two behind you at church or in the community and be an encourager to them.

So many tell me how much they appreciate wisdom from people ahead of them on the journey. As others have poured into you and shared their wisdom that can only come with age, share yours with those who long for examples of how to navigate the twists and turns (and aging) of life gracefully.

Ultimately, I believe gratitude may be one of our best antidotes to the aches, pains, and grief of lost youth that comes with aging. As long as we are on this earth, how can we live in a posture of thanks for the life we’ve been given? And not just life, but for the wisdom and understanding that God graciously gives us over the course of it. For “wisdom is with the aged, and understanding in length of days” (Job 12:12 NLT).

If this is true, then we have every reason to age with anticipation and grace, knowing that our lowly, aging bodies will one day be like Christ’s glorious body (see Philippians 3:21).

 

Julie Baumgardner is the Senior Director of WinShape Marriage. She has nearly 40 years of experience of helping marriages and families thrive. Prior to joining WinShape, she spent 20 years as the President/CEO of First Thing First.